“You’re so quiet” “You’re so anti-social” “I forgot you were even here”
Does this sound familiar? Growing up I was always told I was shy. I was the quiet girl in class and I would pray that I never got picked on to answer a question or speak in front of the class. But as I have grown up, I have realised I’m not shy, stuck up or anti-social. I’m just an Introvert.
- I enjoy my own company and would much rather have a night in than out.
- When meeting new people, I hate small talk but could talk for hours about deep and meaningful subjects.
- To those closest to me I seem mental and crazy but I hate being embarrassed in public.
- For me, team work is distracting and instead I can work much better when I am alone and in quietness.
- I’m awful at physically comforting people when they’re upset but a great listener.
- I choose my friends carefully, but those relationships I do have run deep and will last a lifetime.
- After a busy day, I need time to re-charge and chill (usually in my PJs and on the sofa).
- I am a massive routine whore and hate being unorganised or unprepared for anything.
- At a party, I’ll most likely be making friends with the dog.
- Finally, I have a KILLER resting bitch face.
If any of these traits sound like you, here are my 5 top tips for being an introvert:
Accept Who You Are
To embrace who you are, you must first truly accept who you are. Love your traits, and realise that it is what makes you- YOU. You are loved for being you, so embrace that you are an introvert and see it as a positive attribute. The sooner you accept it is just who you are, the easier the rest of these tips will be.
“Don’t underestimate me because I am quiet. I know more than I say, think more than I speak and observe more than you know.”
Learn to Say NO
You’re allowed to put yourself first. If there’s a something you don’t want to do then don’t go. If it’s going to cause you worry and stress then ask yourself if it’s worth it. Those that understand and care will support you no matter what, and those that don’t aren’t worth your time anyway. But don’t push people away or become unreliable. Always make time for those closest to you and those who appreciate who you truly are.
“An introverts desire for solitude is more than just a preference it is crucial to our health and happiness.”
Don’t Compare Yourself
Other people aren’t you so why compare yourself to them? The people we see on TV, social media and in the spot light are often extroverts, the complete opposite to me and you. So why compare yourself to them? They are often loud, confident and outgoing and that is fine but do not wish yourself to be any other way. No one is you and that is your power.
“Being alone is a power that very few people can handle.”
Focus on your Strengths
You might not be the loudest one in the room but there is so much more to you than that. Because you don’t speak as much people will often value your opinion much more. People will trust your say, come to you for advice and love deep conversations with you. Introverts are often great writers too because they find writing much easier and natural to them than speaking. If that is a strength of yours, work with it!
As an introvert, you will also be great at studying people, observing body language and building deep meaning full relationships. You may only have a few close friends and family but that’s all you need because your relationships are so strong.
Introverts are also very creative and hard workers. When alone, they can really concentrate and focus which often means they can get much more done. Having a great work-ethic and time management is a huge strength so utilise this and stand out from the crowd.
“Your introversion is a gift that doesn’t need to be fixed or cured.”
Put Yourself Out There
It may be scary, but sometimes you must put yourself out there. To life your life to the fullest, sometimes you must do things outside your comfort zone. That is how we grow, expand and learn. By focusing on your strengths as an introvert, you can work with them to put yourself out there and make a difference.
Recently, I have started posting much more frequently on social media about my business and passion, this is something that previously would have embarrassed me. But I have used this platform as a way of showing off my writing, knowledge, experiences and content. My pages don’t have the best selfies on the internet, but there is great content which will hopefully help people. I may not get as many views or shares as the extroverts which show off their muscles and bums, but I am gaining followers that are people who care about what I say.
“Be so good they can’t ignore you.”
Putting yourself out there might be scary at first, but work with it and see it as an opportunity to grow. Don’t let being labelled as shy or quiet affect you, instead own it and see it as a positive. It is your little advantage over any one else because it creates your strengths and you can use these in your favour. But most importantly, it is what makes you- YOU. Don’t ever change or feel inferior because you aren’t as outgoing as some people, it is your secret super power!
“You should be afraid of the quiet ones. They are the ones who actually think.”
Read more of my Guide to Self Love Series Here.